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Keeping the Stress out of Single ParentingMarta Dodd Researched through personal experience! by Marta Dodd Budget Your Money. Even if you are living paycheck to paycheck like most of us, knowing how much money goes to where can be a big help. This gives you the relief that the bills are being paid, with a feel of how much you can spend on allowance, school photos, birthday gifts, entertainment or just You! Keep a Daily Schedule. Time is important, so teach that to the kids by implementing a routine. Put together a schedule reflecting chore & homework time. If the kids know their daily routine then it gives them something fun to work for when the Room is clean or the garbage is taken out. Don’t be afraid to make your own chores so that your children see you set a positive example. Let Your Kids be Kids. Even though taking on Single Parenting has sometimes forced you to become serious and lacking laughter, remember those precious children never asked to be in this situation. Don’t force them to grow up any faster and deal with the “Single Parent Issues” that we have to deal with. They are still kids and they shouldn’t have to worry about anything other than “Kid Issues.” Stay Positive about the Other Parent. No matter the circumstances, don’t down talk the other parent. If the Other Parent isn’t paying child support, it’s none of the kids business and shouldn’t be something that is talked about if not brought up by the child. Whether the parent is around or away, it shouldn’t matter. We once saw good in that person and regardless of how it is now, your child may always think the world of that Other Parent. In time the truth always comes out, and the only way a child will know is discovering for themselves. Communicate to Your Children About the Special Circumstances of Your Family. You can keep your kids informed without telling them everything. If you talk to your kids early on, when they are ready, you can avoid having them learn from a distant relative, some other child from school or even a stranger. Spend Quality Time with Your Children. Keeping your family going takes a lot of energy and a good amount of Quality time away from the kids. Set out a time each day to read, play a game, play on the computer or even learn something new. It could be 2 hours or 20 minutes. What matters is that your child know it’s his/her time and they will look forward to each and every day. Find Support and Use it. There is a lot of help out there, including the resources in this newsletter. Take advantage of them. They’re there for you to utilize. I always keep in mind that one day soon I won’t need them and I can turn around and help others in the same situation. Take Time for Yourself. You may always have your children around, but don’t forget you are still one person. Keep yourself healthy and feeling positive about being a parent. I know it gets tough and you feel like you are all alone, but you’re not. Take some time out to spend with yourself or even to hang out with friends. Adult conversation and a movie is always nice after a long Saturday of nonstop giggling and cartoons!
| RELATED ARTICLES I’m Sorry! Blame-Game or Accountability A powerful tool for health as we approach the new year can be to focus on giving and/or receiving only real apologies when we want to heal a rift with a family member, friend, or co-worker. We hear apologies all the time, but I don’t think many of them are sincere. An apology has to be real to heal. Mutants or Clones In a single dose of childrens television, I was bombarded with themes of mutants, cyborgs, evolving and the digital world. These words intimidated me at first, until I learned what the shows were talking about. I wondered how this prepares children for living in the 21st century. The answer hit me when I came across the saying, "Dont Clone...Mutate." Where Will YOUR Kids Get A Job Lets face it. Chinese Pregnancy Traditionally in China, when once people got married, they would immediately get ready for having a baby. That is why symbolic things such as dolls or lotus seeds would be put on the beds of the newly weds on their wedding day so as to bring in the meaning of having a baby as soon as possible. Healing Anger and Violence in Our Society I have counseled individuals, couples, families and business partners for the past 35 years and authored eight published books. All this experience has resulted in the development of a profound six-step healing process, called Inner Bonding, which anyone can learn and use throughout the day FREE course available - see resource box. Start Growing Healthy Children Before Getting Pregnant When I was in my early 20’s, I read Adele Davis’s book, “Let’s Eat Right To Keep fit.” I learned from her that “you are what you eat.” I also learned that our babies are what we eat while we are pregnant, and then are what they eat once they are born. If you nurse your babies, then they continue to be what you eat as long as you are nursing them. My bible during my first pregnancy over 38 years ago was “Let’s Have Healthy Children,” also by Adele Davis. I started to follow her guidelines way before getting pregnant, knowing that my health had a big effect on my baby’s health. Parents - What Kind of Role Model Are You Are you being the person you want your children to be Teaching Children Good Manners Last week in my newsletter, I mentioned that my children knew how to behave in nice restaurants because they had been exposed to the atmosphere at an early age. My idea of well behaved might be different from yours, however, I think there are certain basics that are important and universal. Children are People, Not Machines When growing up, my father frequently reminded me to "pay attention tothe details." That saying became very real to me in the area ofparenting. While raising children, the details make great differences in development. Minimize Stress in Your Life Use these simple tips to minimize stress in your day to day living. Celebrity Baby Names It seems that the days of naming your son or daughter with your own name and adding a second, third or a fourth sign in roman numerals at the end are fading away. This seems to be especially the case with celebrities. The more unique, the better! As to whether celebrities are simply a little loopy, or whether they simply like the attention that a unique baby name will bring, we do not know. What we do know is that the names just keep getting crazier and crazier. Below is a list of some of our favorite celebrity baby names over the years. Children, Entitlement and God “Setting the alarm on Sunday mornings is inhuman…..God should know that!” Those were my adolescent thoughts every weekend when my parents forced me to church. “I can get more out of my headphones and the Beatles.”It was this way as far back as I can remember. Early Sunday school, then later Bible studies, liturgies in another language, all culminating in a weekly teen rebellion against God and my parents. I really hated my parents especially my Mother for forcing religion on me. “Besides, I don’t think the Smothers Brothers forced their kids, and they are political giants!”I would brood the entire hour’s drive to church just to make my parents as miserable as I felt. It never changed in all those years. 8 Gifts of Parenting No one who has hugged their child can doubt the gift of a child’s presence in their life. The love that is expressed in that simple act is one of the most profound ways that we experience love in this world. In order to nurture the special relationship of parent and child, and fulfill our roles as parents, there are number of things that we are signing up to do. Here is a list of eight essential ways to fulfill our parental responsibilities. Marriages May End But Families Are Forever It was at that time when our marriage was falling apart and we completely hated each other when we needed to work constructively as parents, as our child’s world was crumbling too. Work at Home Jobs and the Internet People with work at home jobs should use the Internet to maximize their businesses. The first necessary Internet tool is a website. You can market and sell just about any product or service via a website. Saving Money on Preschool: Readiness Skills Needed for Kindergarten As a mom of 4 whos youngest child is about to start Kindergarten thisFall, Id like to share with you some things Ive learned aboutPreschool over the last ten years, along with a list of readiness skills every child can be learning at home - whether attending Preschool ornot. 10 Positive Discipline techniques for children Do you feel your child is out of control Punish him or her often and get no positive resultsIt might be your discipline strategy that is not working. Try using positive discipline techniques which are highly recommended by the child development professionals and see the changes in your child’s attitude.See him or her actually making efforts to cooperate with you. 4 Tips for Taking Great Baby Pictures - Even If Youre Not a Professional When my daughter Layla was born I had a hard time putting the camera down. And apparently I wasnt the only one. The cashier at the photo developing shop told me that new parents comprised a fairly sizable chunk of their business. Goal Setting for Kids Goal setting is essential for building a successful life. However, teaching kids how to set and achieve goals is not part of most school curriculums, nor is it taught in most homes. Many parents never learned the techniques of goal setting, and are still struggling with their own. You dont need to know it all. While you develop your own goal-setting skills, you can also be helping and encouraging your children to develop theirs. Goal setting is a life-long skill. It helps your child to focus their unique gifts and talents, it helps to cultivate and strengthening your childs self-worth, and equips them to lead a life full of meaning purpose, and direction, regardless of the professional or personal paths they choose. If Youd Like to Know Why Reading Matters Here Are Some of the Reasons Why Reading Is So Important for Children |
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