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| Dealing with Grief & Loss |
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Dealing with Grief & Loss
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Guilty, Your Honor: The Burden of Guilt After a Suicide Guilty, Your Honor, I whisper. Grief & Loss - Healing Your Broken Heart What is it about Grief & Loss that upsets us so much? Is it the heavy duty emoting that we have to do to get through our suffering? Is it the fear we have about opening ourselves to all this pain? Because, let's face it, it's hard down there, in the land of grieving where all those emotions toss us around like a cork on a stormy sea. New Tears [about Grievng--with commentary] New Tears [about Grieving] Grief Support: The Dos Helpers often ask questions such as: "What should I do? What should I say? Am I doing the right thing? Did I do the wrong thing?" Here are some suggestions for how to best help those in grief. Men and Grief Men grieve differently from women. Our cultural roles make it difficult for men to look for support, and harder again to accept it. Men are so often silent, solitary mourners who immerse themselves in activity and private, symbolic rituals. They feel profoundly, but often can't express the depth of their loss. Grief Support: The Don?ts 1) Don't try to make the grieving person feel better. YOU CANNOT. For many grievers it only serves to make them feel guilty or worse. Grievers MUST experience the pain of grief for healing to ultimately occur. Lessons We Learned From Terri Schiavo Let's talk about Terry Schiavo, since her death illustrated for me many aspects of grief and hope. Who among us was not moved by the drama of her last days? I know I was. Her death was not the way I would want my own death to be. When my time comes, I want no heroic measures, since for me they simply postpone the inevitable. And watching the family feud that took place between her husband and her parents, with all the tension and the anger, saddened me terribly. Peace should be the last emotion Terry felt, but who knows if she heard only the angry words passed between those she loved. No one should have to die as she did. Understanding Grief and Loss in Times of War and Disaster There are many different kinds of losses we can experience in our lives. Indeed, loss in human beings has its beginnings in the birth process that separates the infant from the comfort and security of the mother's womb into a world where survival is conditional and predicated on individual responsibility. The presumable final loss is the end of the human life cycle caused by death. There are many losses in between those polarities that relate to the developmental and aging process in each life. All of these losses are expectable losses and our bereavement and mourning of these losses are colored by their expectability Sympathy Flowers Sending a floral tribute is a very appropriate way of expressing sympathy to a family who has experienced the loss of a loved one. Flowers express a feeling of life and beauty and offer much comfort to the family. A floral tribute can either be sent to a funeral service or to the family's residence. Here are some suggestions to assist you in sending sympathy flowers. Suicide in the Church Part 1 Recently, several suicides have occurred right here in my own hometown of about 16,000 people. The latest of these involved a friend of mine who was, among other things, the leader of a Christian Business Fellowship which I attend. He was a lawyer with a terrific wife, two young kids, very prominent in his church, coached little league baseball. As one can imagine, speculations abound - everything from possible chemical imbalances to unfair, unfounded comments which...well, small town gossip can be so mean-spirited. Adapting to the Loss of a Loved One: Three Tips on how to Cope Have you ever sat down and played a piano where one of the keys wasn't working? Or made cookies and left out an ingredient? Perhaps you've started listening to a favorite CD, and just when it gets to your favorite part of your favorite song, you realize that there is a scratch in it. Euthanasia: How Will I Know When its Time? Pippin needed assistance from his owner to get to his feet. He slowly walked to the door, then needed help once again to step down onto the back porch. With a slight groan, he squatted to relieve himself and came back towards the house. There was no twinkle in his eye, and this time he needed to be carried all the way back to his bed. He'd used up his energy for that day. Dealing With Tragedies (The 9/11 Tragedy) September 11, 2001, marked yet another significant turning point in world history. Whatever innocence was left in the world was lost on that fateful day. Watching Death Like it or not, we think in line with our customs and tradition often times, right down to the level of how we think of death, or about death. I was a licensed counselor for many years, and the issue came up a few times, and I was sad at its results, to hear Americas shamefully trying to avoid talking about it. But let me put that aside and finish the article. Yes customs and traditions set down; do play a big part in how we view death. Death being a normal and natural thing; we mimic our parents and our TV heroes, and how they portray death. Why so much gloom out there on death [?] It has been around for a long time, as long as I've been around anyhow, fifty-seven years. It is often a taboo subject to talk bout it in certain places. But you can see a lot of books on the subject; more than I can count. Coping With A Funeral When the death of a loved one occurs, regardless or whether it was expected or not, you will find yourself having to deal with a great number of people. Some you will know closely, others may be complete strangers; all will be claiming some kind of relationship to the deceased. Angelo Dies Angelo C, was a good man that never did any harm. He died yesterday in the shower over a severe asthma attack. The entire school cried and prayed for their old friend Angelo. They joined in a moment of silence at 2:55 pm to let Angelo know that we care. How to Turn Grief into Joy I was with my daddy when he died. Excuse me, I was with my daddy when his spirit left his body. I drove him to the emergency room because he was having chest pains. He said that they weren't too bad, and his color was good. He was still walking. Why Does God Allow Suffering? Justin was a typical ten year old boy. He liked Leggos, trains, and watching TV. He had red hair, freckles, and a huge smile. Justin was a great kid and everybody loved him. Because of cancer, he didn't live to see his eleventh birthday. His mom Mary, who had watched him suffer for months, held her son in her arms when he died. Every day, for the last two years, she has lived with the grief of her loss and the memories of Justin's suffering. Then and Now Over one hundred years ago, during the Victorian era, death and grief were popular subjects for poems, songs and stories. Grieving was considered a natural and acceptable part of the culture. People in mourning wore black clothing and/or black arm bands, women wore black veils, and it was common to see a black wreath on the door of the home of a bereaved family, announcing publicly that this was a home of sorrow. Bereavement was conspicuous and there were very specific societal customs designed to support people during the mourning process. GoodBye GrandMa My dearest Grandma, I will never forget you & sorry that I was not there with you when you passed.
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