Relationship Information |
|
Relationship Advice: 10 Tips for a Blissful Relationship
1.Often in marriage, especially in the early years, there is a choice: You can be right or you can be happy - not both. Choose wisely. As a friend of mine said after his first year of marriage: "I finally figured out that the sun will come up tomorrow if we do it her way." 2.Learn the gentle art of cooperation. Related to wanting to be right, competition in a marriage is corrosive _ it eats away at all the good stuff. If you are going to compete, compete together to have the very best marriage you can have. 3.Talk about the important stuff. Most couples spend more time planning a vacation than they do planning for their relationship. Create a relationship vision by asking: "If we could have it exactly like we want, how would it be?" Build from there. If you get stuck, ask or hire someone to help. 4.Forgive as much or more than you would like to be forgiven. Sometimes forgiveness is a gift you give yourself, especially when you do not feel like it. Forgiveness can release you from the pain of the offense. 5.Celebrate what you want to see more of. Appreciation can go a long way. 6.Listen to the heart more than you listen to the words. Focusing on the words can lead to endless and meaningless debate: "No, that did not happen on Tuesday, it happened on Monday!" Focusing on the heart behind the words can lead to resolution of conflict and to taking care of each other. 7.Don't be a Darren Stevens. In the old sitcom "Bewitched," Samantha merely had to wiggle her nose to make incredible things happen. Darren was always trying to get her to stop using her magical powers. Even as a little kid, I thought the guy was nuts. He could have had anything he wanted. Instead he tried to get Sam to stifle her gifts. Encourage your partner in her gifts. 8.Check out your communication. While it's easy for two people to talk to each other, sometimes it is more difficult to really communicate with each other. Practice these two sentences: "What I think you're saying is . . . did I miss anything?" and "Please, tell me what you think I just said." 9.Take responsibility for your contributions to the struggle. In 20 years of doing marriage counseling, I've yet to see a relationship problem that didn't have two sets of fingerprints all over it. Yet, we tend to focus on what the other person is doing. "If only you would . . . . ,then everything would be OK." One of the quickest paths to frustration and failure is to try to change someone else. Take responsibility to change your contribution to the problem, whether it's what you are doing and/or how you respond to what your partner is doing. 10.Don't assume that just because you are married, you know how to be married. Pay attention to what works for other couples. Read all you can. Go to seminars. Everybody needs a coach. Find one. It's a lot less expensive than divorce, financially and emotionally. Jeff Herring is a Relationship Coach, Speaker, and Syndicated Relationship Columnist. Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for more relationship tips and tools, a free internet newsletter and free e-programs to enrich your relationship.
|
RELATED ARTICLES
How Valentine?s Day Gifts Can Expose a Cheating Husband If you have the nagging feeling that your husband may be having an affair, this is the ideal time to confirm what you suspect. The Valentine's Day gifts he gives or receives can provide you with tangible proof of his infidelity. Valentines Day Gifts Can Expose a Cheating Husband If you have the uneasy feeling that your husband is having an extramarital affair, Valentine's Day is the ideal time to confirm what you suspect. The Valentine's Day gift he gives his mistress or the gift he receives from her in return, can provide you with proof of his infidelity. What Do the Words ?I Don?t Love You Anymore? Really Mean? Have you been blindsided by an unhappy spouse who suddenly announced, "I don't love you anymore"? If so, then you know that these words can split a marriage wide open, along with the heart of the partner who may not have suspected that anything was wrong. How To Make Hooking Up With Your Ex More Thrilling Than It Ever Was Before! Now I really have seen everything. How We Define Our Relationships? We can fall into the habit of complaining about our relationships, but do we really take the time to evaluate them? Maybe not, because well, we're always right! He or she never listens to ME or does things the way I think is right (the human EGO speaking loudly here!). 8 Ways to Improve Your Long Distance Relationship Couples in love may often find themselves having to live apart for a period of time throughout their relationship due to job commitment, studies, military obligation and etc. This has made us wonder whether a relationship can survive the physical distance. Different people may have different view towards the subject and if you ask me?. I will give you this answer? "YOU are the one who is going to determine whether it will work or not" "There are nobody in this world who can tell you whether you can survive or not except yourself". Surviving a long distance relationship is not about promises or luck but it is very much dependent on how you think, act, manage and most importantly, how you want the outcome to be. Therefore it is very important to make up your mind whether you want the relationship to work or not. It will be easier once you have done that as there are tons of thing you can do to improve your distance relationship. Below are the ways you can use to survive and improve your distance relationship in summary. What is Abuse? Violence in the family often follows other forms of more subtle and long-term abuse: verbal, emotional, psychological sexual, or financial. Victorias Secret Disclosed! SHHHHHH, don't tell anybody, but, I know the secret. Improve Relationships With Style Have you ever felt that relationships are messy? These messes, are they inevitable? Is there anything to do to minimize the mess? Can cleaning a messy relationship be possible? How do you manage a relationship with some many different kind of people? 7 Steps To Creating A Healthy Relationship Everything in life, in order to be a success, requires knowledge and education to some extent. We read, study and take courses on several subjects that we as human beings require in order to live the life we choose to live. If we wish to improve on a certain area of life such as career and education we simply enroll in classes or find alternative methods that will provide us with the information we are seeking. However, we were not taught to educate ourselves on relationships-the most essential factor to living in this world. We must be able to relate to others in order to create an environment that we feel is desirable and supportive to us. Here I am providing 7 steps to having a healthy relationship. Whether you are in a current relationship or seeking one, these are key ingredients to creating and improving the relationship you desire. Improve Your Love Luck with Feng Shui! Are you tired of looking for love without success? If so, the layout, furnishings, and energy of your home and bedroom could be part of the problem. When the areas of your home affecting your love life are cluttered, missing from your floor plan, or suffering from sha chi (harmful energy) it can be difficult to find and maintain a good relationship. Daisies A Story About Life "I love daisies too," she told him several nights after they first met. She wasn't sure why she blurted it out but it seemed the normal thing to say considering the conversation they were having. They were talking about "favorite things" the way you do when you are trying to get to know someone. Small talk that keeps the conversation flowing: Mairi Mairi came into my life about two years ago. She came from Arizona with a cheap trailer, four kids from three different fathers, and a seriously negative attitude. We met on a frosty October afternoon and with my Victorian upbringing, I developed a seriously negative attitude toward her. However, as time went on and I matured, we evolved from wary strangers into polite acquaintances then into comfortable friends The Friend Who Taught Me Knowing her day can be dreadfully tiresome when she mounts her soapbox, there's much to like and enjoy about her life so far. Friendship - A Relation of Choice! Introduction Warning Signs He / She May Not Be The One We've all looked back on past relationships and said, "What was I thinking". Problem is, you weren't thinking. You were caught up in the chemistry and the wonderful feelings of the moment that you chose to overlook some warning signs that there may be trouble up ahead. Here is a list of things to look out for when dating: Global Conflict and Inter-Religious Dialogue: The Importance of Understanding Others As is learned in the study of Comparative Religion, the Avitars (Moses, Muhammad, Jesus, Buddha, Confucius, Abraham and others) had amazingly similar philosophies of belief ... centered on Right Action as a path: respect others, think positively, be helpful and be compassionate. It is their disciples, especially in the extreme (and the subsequent dogmas) that have made modern religions unnecessarily complex and adversarial. Universal Laws for Couples The Law of Connection: Spouses are either growing closer or growing apart. You don't get to stand still in relationships for very long. So we need to know two things: What does it take to continue to feel connected to my spouse? And what does it take for my spouse to continue to feel connected to me? Romance Matters You are never too old and it is never too late to romance that special someone whom you love. There are so many things to do and so many ways to do it. So often, we have merely gotten out of the habit. Pay Attention! Mastering Communication Skills with Women One of the biggest complaints women have about men is they just don't listen. This can cause big problems in the relationship. Sure, you may hear the words, but are you really absorbing what she is saying? It's a serious mistake not to pay attention or take her words seriously and could mean the ultimate failure of the relationship if that bad habit continues. |
home | site map |
© 2005 |