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Relationship Information
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Assuming Personal Responsibility in Relationships Stephen Covey in 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families says that responsibility is really the " ability to choose our response." We don't have to respond to stimuli and triggers the same way we have always done. We do have a choice. It may take some practice and a real commitment on our part to let go of old patterns and try something new, but it is worth it in peace of mind, deeper relationships and conversations that don't end in arguments. The kind of communication we seek depends on a number of things; mutual respect and courtesy, a willingness to listen to other points of view and good timing. A Little Help Finding Love A little help finding love online. Pros and Cons of Online Relationships Modern technology hasn't solved any of the problems of creating and preserving a good relationship. Computers and the internet have merely added a new wrinkle in old pattern of love and loss. With websites that specialize in matching people up according to whatever criteria they choose, there are more and more people finding each other but, unfortunately, not many manage to stay together. While internet dating services may make it easier for people in one location to find people in a different location, it does absolutely nothing to give them the tools they need to stay together once they've met. A Man Drought In Australasia - Bugger! Age is Against Me Men wanted desperately, it's official. The increasing surplus of high quality women in the 30 plus age group over suitable available men is becoming a major problem in both New Zealand and Australia. The Thoughts that Occupy the Minds of Most Men Please note that this is not an attempt to give you a comprehensive list of the thoughts of all men, but rather my attempt to lead you into the crevice of the minds of most men. There are certainly men that do not think of most of the things here - those yet to be born. Also, remember that what a man thinks of is also a function of his age, status, profession, sexual orientation, etc. But even when all these variables are taken into consideration, you will find out that most men basically think of mostly the following things; Thick Slice, Or Thin? Malcolm Gladwell's book "Blink" is a fascinating read. The subtitle "The Power of Thinking Without Thinking" gives some clue to its thesis. It's a book that Gladwell describes as being about 'the thoughts and decisions that bubble up from our unconscious.' Here Come the Questions Why is it that even though I am not positive if I like a guy, because of course it's only been a week, that when he doesn't call for 3 days it becomes a dramatic incident, and all of a sudden its Fiona Apple time? There is no reason for him to not call; everything was fine last we spoke. With the time frame we are discussing here in the first place it shouldn't even phase me that a man decides to not call for 3 days, or possibly (gulp) never again. I never slept with him, I never drunkenly made a fool of myself over him or around him, in fact we had a lovely first date, probably one of the most successful I have ever been on considering this particular date including shopping. On top of that we spoke multiple times this week. Now it is Sunday night and I have heard nothing from the adorable Mr. Foley, it shouldn't matter. But it does. Creative Visualizations for Love To manifest love through creative visualization, you first need to learn how to suspend or hold an image of the desired outcome in your mind in as much detail as possible. Dangerous Relationship? I will in this article cover some of my own experiences living with a person with a dysfunctional personal disorder of type borderline. I call these person BP (BorderlinePersonality) to make things easier. How a Written Agreement Can Enhance Your Relationship Marital contracts have an honorable history going back thousands of years, but they have not been put to good use for modern couples. Instead they have developed a bad reputation for being legalistic, money-grubbing things, negatively preoccupied with all that might go wrong in the future, and too often used to strip a woman marrying a wealthy man of her rights to property, support, and inheritance. But it doesn't have to be that way. Relationships That Really Last: Is This the Secret? In my e-book, How to Build Relationships That Stick, I told over a story I once heard in the name of a famous relationships counselor who talks on radio shows. It was claimed to be an authentic account of something that happened in real life, but even if it's apocryphal, I'm very much inclined to believe it could happen. Relationship Tune Up - 7 Key Points to Avoid a Break Up or Break Down "Every three months or 3,000 miles." How To (Wo)man Your Boundaries The first time I ever heard "boundaries" mentioned, it was by my then husband. He informed me that I had to protect and hold his boundaries. (There was nothing that man wouldn't dump at my door!) Do You Love Reading The Daily Horoscopes, Part I Have you ever wondered why you feel an instant attraction to certain people? These intense reactions are pre-determined by a powerful astrological principle commonly known as horoscopes. How to Have an Affair - Beware! People decide to have an affair for many reasons. They could have become disappointed with their marriage expectations which may have been too high to fulfil or they may simply want to carry on having an open relationship as they have in their past. Want To Strengthen Your Relationship Open your mouth. What do I mean? Talk ? say what's on your mind. Walking around with a chip on your shoulder will not strengthen your relationship. It will only create more distance between you and your mate. If you can't find the right words to say, write a letter. You may think that not saying something will make the issue or problem go away ? it won't. What it will do is build resentment towards your mate and open up the door for other problems to crawl in. 60 Words and Phrases that Make Men Fall Deeper in Love The interesting thing about getting the love you deserve is that you have a great deal of influence in the kind of love you get. Most times, the love one gets is a function of the kind of love one gives. And when it comes to love, communication is the fuel that fans its flame. The words you choose can be the difference between a relationship where there is constant drama or one that is nurturing, blissful and romantic. How to Survive Long Distance Relationships One of the great obstacles to maintaining a healthy relationship these days occurs when jobs or other situations put physical distance between the two partners. This ultimately leads to what is called a long distance relationship that neither party may have been prepared for in the beginning. Long distance relationships require special skills to keep the connection strong and the communication flowing between the couple. The good news is that overcoming physical distances is a lot easier to accomplish than overcoming emotional distances between people. That is, if the two parties handle the situation correctly. A Guide to Relationship Quizzes Sometime in the 1950's, women's magazines started publishing relationship quizzes in their pages with a complex scoring system that arrived at a number. This number was then plotted on a scale and the reader could determine, based upon that number, whether their relationship was "good" or not. It seems silly, and compared with the complex testing done today for relationships, it is silly. But it started a phenomenon still going strong. Back then the popular psychological testing technique that was being used in spy films and TV dramas was the Rorschach test. You looked at the squiggly designs and if you interpreted them as female body parts or death figures the red flags went up. Psychology has improved a bit since then and so has the relationship quiz. Whats Up With Unconditional Love? To tell you the truth, I'm a little disillusioned with the term unconditional love, lately. It's just not "natural". The phrase has been used for decades, by psychologists, therapists, A.A. types and the overall spiritually minded to describe how one should cope with impossible behavior." The original principle behind the concept, was to help the person who is being abused accept the circumstances and not have to live in a perpetual state of resentment towards their partner. You, as the codependent (ie the one who is always hurt) is supposed to see your partner as "sick" and not blame him or her for their actions. You're supposed to love and care for the adulterer, batterer, gambler, manic depressive or alcoholic the same way you would someone who has the flu. Husband comes home drunk? Sober him up with cups of black coffee and a dose of your eternally burning, unconditional love. Boyfriend unfaithful? That's O.k., because you have unconditional love for him that will last for an eternity. Girlfriends rack up your credit cards again with her compulsive shopping? You'll take care of the bills because you're love for her is undying and unconditional and you've told yourself ""I'll always love her no matter what ...."
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